How do you write about being ashamed of what you are to be proud of? I will try. *** A few weeks ago, a friend and I discussed her options as a mother. She has to travel out of the country and was asking for my input regarding leaving her children with her family back in Cameroon. As we discussed the issue, she mentioned that one of her greatest fears regarding leaving her kids with family to raise is their shaming of children, which they practice even in her presence, talk less of in her absence. Her thoughts triggered several recollections of my own childhood. The number of times I was compared with others: “Why can’t you be like C”, “D who did X or Y, does she have two heads”? “Why can’t you ever do things like X?” I recalled reactions to wetting the bed at 5; being told to stand outside on an anthill while your peers and older relatives alike ululate “shame”. And later on, my name being called on the list of the ‘bottom’ ten to be publicly embarrassed before the entire school as not ‘smart enough’. If you’re Cameroonian you’re familiar with such, and most of us got over it. We laugh about these recollections if at all we remember them. And, unfortunately, a lot of us repeat it. We pass on the buck to our own children because, after all, it worked. Shaming is not an exclusively ‘African’ or ‘Cameroonian’ thing. It’s global. Yet, I think our culture is one of the few which has yet to address the negative effects of this practice, probably because we’re so busy trying to survive physically that we haven’t considered mental and emotional health as much as we should. So we still celebrate shaming. It is seen as an effective instrument to get your kid in order. Competition is healthy after all, so shame one person so they will strive to be like the other. The fact remains: it works. But it works in more ways than one: it works to create unhealthy stereotypes, like in determining what intelligence is; it works to further internalized misogyny and destructive competition between women, who live to avoid shaming or grow to believe they must be better than the next woman and thus bring the other down. Shaming works well, above all, as a destroyer of self-esteem; something we find out too late that we need for literally every part of adulting. Shaming is the bacteria we are infected with as children, one that was to act as a vaccine against complacency and build resistance for a competitive world. Yet this ‘vaccine’ eventually does more harm than good. If not curbed, the ‘bacteria’ grows and spreads. It takes root in our minds, destroys our self-image, tarnishes our ability to empathize with others, and dehumanizes us. We see it regularly, particularly among women. There’s this urge to say “at least I’m better than so and so”, because we feel we can only be enough in comparison. Not by ourselves, not as we are. Comparing women to each other to make one feel lesser than the other is a sadly common and accepted practice. Nearly all entertainment news offers a segment with “who wore it better” comparisons and lifestyle mags intentionally ‘other’ women with articles that compare them and create one set-in-stone ideal. Is it any wonder then that we feel “you are not like other women” is a compliment? As is the case with things which are common, I had taken our shaming culture and competing with other women in stride and for granted. That is to say, though I acknowledged them, they were not things I considered with depth. I’ve been on a journey to self-love for most of my adult life – and I’m still on it –, so I was too busy trying not to think of myself as lesser to bother thinking of someone else as lesser. Yet, recently I was given a rude awakening to this practice and its effects on me – aside from the earlier mentioned conversation with my friend. *** A week ago I posted the following tongue-in-cheek post on Facebook: Tips to know if you should comment on someone’s weight: 1- Did they ask you? 2- Are you their doctor, sponsor/guardian of their health? 3- Are you an intimate friend/partner who is permitted to share any and all opinions? (note that I didn’t ask if you were related, that doesn’t count) If you answered no to all these, here’s the tip: Shut up. As I expected, most of my friends who commented on the post assumed someone had fat-shamed. So they either shared their own experiences with fat-shaming, proffered similarly barbed ‘tips’ to fat-shamers, or tried to assuage me with idioms along the lines of ‘you are not fat, you have fat’. I said nothing. They had assumed wrongly that I had been fat-shamed, yet their reactions proved why I felt bad about being praised for having lost weight recently. Actually, my post was inspired by comments from a few people, who gave me a rude awakening when they approached me to praise me for my recent weight-loss and, in so doing, compared me with either another woman or worse, with myself. The back-handed compliments included: “Ooo Monique I’m so proud of you! See how better you look now! If you had started this sometime back you would be married by now I bet!” “Wow, Monique! You have done it oo! Please tell [X] to follow your example. With your new looks and everything else you will pass those slay queens” “I can see you’re working on your weight; that is good. I’m proud of this new you, she is definitely better” And, with these comments, I felt shame. Shame because, suddenly, my weight-loss journey, something I should be proud of given that it is a testament to my growth in other areas of my life (mental, spiritual, and emotional) was suddenly made shallow. It
Travelogue: S.A has me thinking we’re cursed… but not for the reason you think
It’s been a while since I’ve written a travelogue, a post about a travel experience. Well, as I’m presently studying in South Africa and will likely have my longest experience as a foreigner here, there’ll likely be more travelogues with impressions. As expected, a frequent question one receives when in a new place is “how is it over there?” to which “fine” is for once an impolite answer. You’re expected to elaborate. Describe how new the streets are, how often you see skyscrapers and the flamboyance or extreme poverty or both. You are expected to share info people could use in conversation even if they haven’t been there. Like we did in boarding school; tell the person of the ease of getting a car in S.A – if you’re South African of course- so they can share the worldly knowledge at their Njangi meeting “You know my daughter is in South African and she says South Africans are…” I am doing a poor job at relating these expected elaborations. When I am asked ‘how is it over there’? I can’t think of anything out of the norm. For me, the country ‘was as imagined’. It neither exceeded my expectations nor did it particularly underwhelm me. What it has done, however, is make me wonder if Cameroon may be cursed. I know what you’re thinking. That I have likely been asking myself “why can’t Cameroon have this [insert visible aspect of development here] or that’? Well you’re wrong. That is not what has me considering a national curse. My thoughts on a Cameroonian curse are quite literal, I do believe we may have been cursed, as in jinxed, having angered the dead. See, when people ask me to describe S.A this is what comes to mind: nearly every other street is named for Mandela, statues of the ‘national patriarch’ consistently feature in all urban locations such that you can play ‘connect the dots’ with ease. Every campus has some hall honoring some apartheid hero/heroine, students actively protest the statues and emblems of former oppressors, the history of the people and their champions are so well-recorded, the stories of those who sacrificed made easily accessible… I do not claim that all South Africans know their full history, but they recognize their heroes’ names. They remember those who went before, what they once had to endure, those who died for what is theirs today. And for this reason, I can only wonder if Cameroon carries a curse. Imagine yourself as Ernest and Martha Ouandie, Um Nyobe, Ndeh Ntumazah, Njoh Litumbe, A.N Jua and many more… matriarchs and patriarchs whose efforts for our nation has gone barely noticed. Their names selectively taught in history lessons across the country depending on the location of the school, or the teacher’s predictions for national exams. Their stories and sacrifices almost forgotten, left to the Twitter pages of @HisotireduCameroun or @Dibussi to remind us with “In this day in Cameroon history”. With each day I walk around my campus, I see the halls named for South African heroes and on days commemorating them, I see posters with messages by them. For the life of me, I cannot recall any quotations from Um Nyobe, no posters or memes highlight inspirational words from Foncha for me to share as the host of Cameroonian friends share memes with ‘quotables’ from Martin Luther King Jr. or Mandela on their respective days. Our history is lost to us, the efforts and mistakes of our own have been ignored, is it any wonder why we’re currently repeating history? When did we ever learn it enough to heed it? I’d like to think I’m fanciful, that I’m being superstitious with this… but what if it’s true? What if we’re cursed? That’s what comes to mind each time someone asks ‘tell me about S.A’. I’d like to respond with, “S.A remembers somewhat, here you can feel that the people know where they’ve been even if they don’t know where they’re going”. S.A forces me to realize that in Cameroon we know neither.
How a Reading Challenge Led to a Lifestyle Change…
Somethings we know, but don’t know. You know? Like we all know we could do more if we spend the first hour of our day effectively. But we STILL roll-over and check our phone for notifications first thing in the morning. Knowledge doesn’t always render one better action. And as I’m known to say, knowing your problem is the first step, but still, it’s only one of many, many more. Yeah, not such a motivational statement so perhaps you shouldn’t quote me. Well, one of those lessons we all know is the point of this piece… We all know consistency and perseverance yields fruits. There’s not a single motivational speaker, preacher, teacher and parent who hasn’t hammered “just keep going” into their speech, book, sermon- you name it. And still, this knowledge floats like a lily-pod on the rivers of our thoughts. Just there, acknowledged but not really seen, nor wholeheartedly believed for the fact that it is. After all, is it is to ‘just keep going’ and find out if that works? Not so recently I took up a challenge that made me really LEARN this lesson and it led to several impressive lifestyle changes which have so far impacted my health, Christian journey and general outlook on life. In 2015 I was fortunate to be one of 25 young African women to be awarded a MILEAD fellowship. This marked my entry into an international sisterhood I appreciate more and more each year. Your network is indeed your net worth people. Well, late in 2017, an opportunity was shared for members of this network. It was a 25 week reading challenge called the KK Reading Prize. Those interested in joining were called upon to register; we would need to read a suitable book a week for 25 weeks, write short book reports stating the gist, how it impacted us personally and professionally, what we liked and disliked and a quote which stood out. For our efforts, we stood a chance to win 1000USD. I swear I read that email twice and responded with interest faster than I’ve replied to messages from a crush. If you know me, you know I like reading. Love books! Advocate for reading and consider gifts of books as equal to gifts of money. So, an opportunity to get paid for reading obviously sounded like God saying, here you go, have a gift. Well, not quite. The contest was to officially begin with our submitting our first book reports on Monday the 3rd of October 2017. Unfortunately, I found myself facing the unexpected problem of internet shutdown as the Anglophone crisis peaked on the 1st of October 2017 with declarations of ‘independence’. I sent SMS to other MILEAD fellows and explained my situation. I eventually sent in that first submission as soon as I could travel to Douala in the neighboring region (Internet Cameroon). That internet ban was shorter, we received access within a week. I should have been on track after that, submitting my reports regularly. Life soon proved that it wasn’t that simple. I found that even with something you love doing, you need to program it in. I found that few good things happen by chance and I learned a lot about myself over the 25 weeks of the reading challenge. First off, as per the contest rules, we were to read ’empowering books for professional and personal development’. This forced me out of my ‘comfort zone’ of pop and literary fiction. I struggled slightly but eventually found adequate books. Still, reading them and writing on them took a lot more effort than I had envisaged. I came to the realization that though I could read pop-fiction on the road, or anywhere for that matter, this wasn’t the case for heavier literature. Reading for me has always been about escape. I needed books and used them to get away from reality. With the literature prescribed by the contest, however, this was not possible. I had to confront myself through the literature. Confront myself and see that I was my own stumbling block, my own greatest problem. While reading the likes of I am Malala and The Diary of Anne Frank was inspiring it also made me feel like a failure and shamed me for what were current complaints. So during the challenge I always found myself reading two books, I would have my favorite Nora Roberts’ or Lauri Kubuitsile book on my bedside cupboard and the ‘required’ suitable book for the challenge would sit on my work-table. Because that was ‘work’. I struggled to finish the self-help and suitable books most weeks- even though I’d read Harry Potter (book seven) in less than 10 hours. The experience showed me how dire my escapist tendency was. This wasn’t about just a contest any longer, was I escaping, what else was it affecting aside from a challenge? Upon reflection? A great deal. I noticed how I escape reading certain books in the Bible altogether, How meditating for long is difficult for me. It forces me to think on issues I’d rather avoid so a brief prayer and song should do. I noticed how in escaping the pain my diary entries were sporadic, I would have to write later, struggling to find words to express feelings which we now stale for being shut away till I forced myself to open the box I’d locked them in. That is the greatest difficulties I face in writing. Over those weeks I faced another challenge, time management. Like most people, I’m a horrible procrastinator. Still, I’ve been praised for my discipline and goal-mindedness so often I believed the voices of others rather than taking an honest look at myself. I mean, yes as compared to several friends, I have more discipline. But then compared with others I know, I’m undisciplined and do bare-minimum at last-minute. Like Cameroon choosing to belong to CEMAC rather than ECOWAS, I had been placing myself in the group where I looked better off. When those easily impressed people said remarked on my ‘great discipline’ I should have
Be THAT Christian Friend
I’ve observed that the Christian journey is too often a lonely one. Despite the fact that the Bible prioritizes fellowship. Today we’ve limited fellowship to church services, choir meetings and if we’re particularly fastidious we are members of Bible study. I do not mean to suggest any of these are the ‘wrong’ way of fellowship. But these are far from enough. Very far. These groups have activities which are scheduled. You come in, sing songs, pray, listen to a sermon, talk about contributions for this or that and leave till next week. There’s very little change, week after week. Very little digging below the surface. And unless the topic of the sermon or bible study resonates with what one member is going through at the time, they may not have the opportunity to raise their problem for joint contemplation. It’s just the way it is, irrespective of the church, meetings have schedules and when there are more than three people involved it is difficult enough to fit conversations within a schedule and have members bond to the level of sharing personal trials. This is where friends come in. We need friends. And while I encourage have both Christian and non-Christian friends, I am focusing on Christian friends for this post. So, I’ll repeat that we need Christian friends. Friends who will understand the call you have been given, what you believe in, why you aspire after what you do, why certain things may matter so much and other things matter so less. Friends to turn to for accountability, for support when things just don’t make sense, to share corny Christian jokes with, to have debates on issues of faith with, and who would say a prayer when you are too tired and resigned to pray for yourself. We need Christian friends. In my opinion, we need them more than we need the plethora of church activities (although that may be a great place to find one). See a true friend knows you, a great deal about you and still loves you. A true friend will tell you what you NEED to hear even if you do not WANT to hear it. A true friend would empathize, check on you, ask you about that assignment you were struggling with even when you thought they had forgotten. With a true friend, you can be comfortable to be your true self, say it like it is, bare your soul, dreams, fears and all. A true friend is a confidant, something your pastor or priest could never be no matter the number of confessions you do. A true Christian friend goes a step further; they will pray for you, pray with you, find the right verse or resource in hope it will speak to you or further encourage you, question you, question with you, traverse the Christian journey with you, grow with you, and they will accept you- flaws and all, trainee Christian that you are. Indeed, we all need a Christian friend. But, I’ve observed it is very rare to find one. Oh, Christians have tons of friends, but the person I’ve described above? A rarity. To have such a friend is to be willing to be vulnerable, to reveal that we are very flawed, something we can do to God in our silent prayers, but are unwilling to divulge to another human being. To have such a friend also means succeeding to find someone who is willing to be vulnerable with you. Someone who is willing to love and put as much effort in the job/relationship of being your Christian friend as they are with their other relationships and life purposes. To have such a friend means having found someone you can confide in with no condemnation, who you can discuss ALL of you with, who allows you to be yourself even while challenging you to be your best. I believe our best fellowship happens with friends like these. I also believe a lot of us are failing at our individual journeys, struggling under the weight of it all alone because we have heard too often “that salvation is personal’ and lack such friendships. This should not be so,. With this post, I urge you to check on your Christian friends and invest in a strong Christian friendship today. If you can’t find one, please be one. Be the kind of friend someone could share their heart with, be the friend who will care enough to check on another, to ask questions below the surface, to allow and encourage others to be themselves, to create a nonjudgmental space, and to be vulnerable. Be THAT kind of Christian friend. The Christian journey is tough and too often lonely, fill a vacancy.
The Employment Problem Cameroonians Are Not Talking About
When we think of employment issues in Cameroon, we often think of the unemployment and how graduates can go for years looking for suitable work. We think of underemployment and how someone with a masters degree in rural development could end up driving a taxi We talk about the lottery-like national entrance exams into the civil service, the corruption, and tribalism that pervades the whole process. But what about after employment? What about those who do make it past that line and then set the standard of mediocrity which is killing us as a nation? That’s what I’m musing on this month. Check out the vlog below and leave me your thoughts in the comments!
For Christian Girls Who Have Sought Reasons to Live When Faith is Not Enough
I know what it means sister, Know what it means to seek hope like children seek fireflies on too-warm evenings I know what it means sister, Know what it means when you finally catch one… and the light flickers. Off I know what it means sister, Know what it means to question and scold yourself for ingratitude For surely you must be ungrateful. Surely you haven’t appreciated enough if you feel this way I know what it means sister, Know what it means to be told to pray the darkness away. Know that on some days it works, and others it doesn’t I know. I know what most don’t That praying over it means thinking about it And thinking leads to overthinking. Overfeeling And possibly drowning in what you’d rather escape. I know how hard it is to tell, sister How hard it is to explain what you, yourself, can barely understand. How to describe the feeling you fight when some days it’s easy to beat… And at other times it needs weeks… I know sister, I know So don’t feel you’re not holy enough, Never feel you’re not faith-full enough “Enough” faith is for the martyrs… but we’re all just learners here Be consoled in that someone knows sister That someone understands you setting up a vision board with reasons to live That someone understands that even the scripture, that double-edged sword. Finds it hard to cut through the cloak that is depression. Seek all the help you can, sister. And if you need me, I’m here. I do not know it all, But this much I do.
The Extravagance of Black Forgiveness
A friend of mine recently asked me why I haven’t written about the situation back home. He said he “wished I was still back home because I’d feel more acutely the pain of the situation and write some good pieces”. I tell him that I, like many others, am tired. Fed up with the stupidity and arrogance which drives this situation. Yet, if conversations could run for pages long, I would have simply shared the following piece which I wrote at the end of November 2017 but never shared- till now. *** A week after Zimbabwe offered the world what may be the most civil coup ever, you are still reading articles, think-pieces overanalyzed op-ed pieces on the ‘rise and fall of Uncle Bob’. You are still interested despite the repetition, despite the dread the writers generally project of what next. You are still interested because in reading those pieces you are encouraged that someday (hopefully soon) your own Mugabe shall fall, or be toppled… whichever way would do. But a week later you come across new information, details of the largess which characterizes Mugabe’s pension upon forced retirement. His presidential salary will continue as is, he receives a lump sum of 10 million USD, maintains all properties acquired as president, health coverage, and several other benefits. An obviously generous pension considering whatever his family had already looted. The generosity baffles you; this cannot possibly be the sanction for dictatorship, this cannot be the sanction for forcing millions of your people into exile and holding the growth of a whole nation hostage. This cannot possibly be what people marched for. You are not Zimbabwean, so you read the comments. Most say they’re fine with it, that it is better than having him in power. That Zimbabwe must move on. That they do not need to fight with the tyrant. One particular comment stands out: “Zimbabwean’s should forgive the bastard not for him but to free themselves”. The comment tugs at your memory, you have heard that before. You have heard it on several occasions. You heard it when Gambia’s Jammeh lost “Don’t mention prosecuting him, just let him go so you can move on…” You heard similar last year and dozens of times before when a Cameroonian immigrant woman you know was told to forgive her abusive husband for the sake of her kids “Don’t put those children through the court process in this country ooo. These people will ask them all sort of questions. We are not white people. Settle this in your family so you can move on with dignity.” You have heard this so many times, linked to scripture like whole countries are of one faith. Like forgiveness can be demanded. A commodity one can order. Yet this time, perhaps because you are reading the articles expectantly looking to Zimbabwe as a beacon of hope for the potential toppling of your own dictator, you are upset by the extravagance of black forgiveness. You recall the first comment you made upon learning of black petting zoos, and how black children were caged to be observed like animals. You said: We have forgiven too much. We have. And we have forgiven on behalf of too many, who never did and never may get closure. You also recall the Charlottesville shooting and the quickly offered, widely publicised forgiveness of Dylan Roof. You had wondered then as you wonder now, who gave them the authority to forgive. Yes, they were related to the victims, just like those who now forgive are Zimbabwean, but the evil was done to us all, has marked us all, has built anger in us all… who and what quenches the fire of injustices when one forgives for the whole. And why are we the ones always forgiving? We Blacks, we Africans, we Women. Why does the victim get told “to forgive is divine”, like victimisation made one saintly, propelled them into the realm of divinity. And if we must forgive, which is just fine by the way, do we not deserve to get an apology first? No repentance? No justice? Do we just bury the pain like a secret hidden in a chest for another generation to dig and discover? Does the dictator get a scholarship named after him like Rhodes so three generations pass and our children know him as a benefactor rather than an abuser? Above all, as you contemplate this exceedingly gracious treatment of a fallen dictator you wonder what it means for you and yours. As you look at Zimbabwe as an example, if no longer a beacon, you wonder why one should bother decrying the exploitation, mismanagement and abuse of Cameroonian government officials who would be so readily forgiven. If on one hand, African leaders who leave power ‘with good will” receive a boon by way of the Mo Ibrahim Prize effectively congratulating them for doing what the constitutions they swore to uphold said they ought to do…and those who don’t leave get generous retirement packages like Mugabe, promises to be left alone and not tried for crimes like Jammeh, or promises of lifelong Party leadership positions like dos Santos… if those are the options why denounce your Mugabe. If those are the options they have to choose from, they never really fall. And justice is never really served, definitely not implemented by us. For we forgive. Our forgiveness is expected, extravagantly gracious, shortsighted and shallow. Doing an even greater injustice to the memory of the injustice done to us. It is our forgiveness that has descendants of abusers, still enjoying historical privilege yet forming trade unions and denying that apartheid was an injustice. It is our forgiveness that has Kanye West saying slavery was a choice. It is our forgiveness that leaves our Cameroonian children unable to name the revolutionaries which fought for our independence. It is as a result of our profligate forgiveness that fifty years on, we have more statues and schools named after colonial figures than we do
April 2018’s Missing Post II: Doing away with Stereotypes One initiative at a Time
There’s a lot to rant about when it comes to Cameroon. Increasingly heavy militarization and other government mishandling of the problems in the Anglophone regions, the fight against Boko Haram in the North and developmental problems from bad roads to corrupt institutions plaguing all ends of the nation. Perhaps because there is so much to rant about, we as Cameroonians tend to see mostly the negatives and own them, while rarely appreciating the positive. How often do you hear someone muttering “C’est Cameroun” with disgusted resignation? Or if we do notice something positive we remark on it as though it were ‘nothing much’. Shortly after I set up Better Breed Cameroon, I decided that I will try to ‘light candles’ as often as I curse the darkness. I have often failed to achieve that parity, but fortunately, no one gave me the sole task of being a superhero. And even more, fortunately, there are many more like me, many other young people seeking to help make some positive change in their own way and for that I’m grateful Recently, one of those negatives we had owned as Cameroonians- the stereotype that “Cameroonian’s don’t read”- is being taken head on by several youth-led initiatives which prove Cameroonian do love/appreciate the beauty of words. Both the writing and reading of it. So without further ado, let me introduce you to just a handful of names/initiative titles to drop the next time someone presumes to tell you “Cameroonian’s don’t read. Bakwa Magazine’s 100 Days of Cameroonian Literature For 100 days, renowned literary magazine Bakwa Mag put a spotlight on Cameroonian literature, showcasing books by Cameroonian authors of all genres and both national languages. This social media campaign ran with the hashtag #100DaysofCameroonianLiterature between December 2017 and March 2018. The campaigned was widely followed particularly on Twitter with several statements of appreciation to Bakwa for their introducing people to books and authors they’d either forgotten or never heard of before. In the words of Bakwa editor Dzekashu Macviban “We did this both to showcase the diversity of Cameroonian writing as well as debunk the notion that there isn’t enough writing from Cameroon”. Well, Bakwa definitely proved people wrong. IYA Restaurants Griot Nights IYA Restaurant has established itself as a culinary and cultural delight located in Buea, Cameroon. Along with a magnificent menu, the restaurant offers events to bring the ‘Bougie’ of Buea out. One of those events it has highly encouraged is regular spoken word poetry events. Every last Saturday of the month, a crowd made mostly of University of Buea students with guests like Olga from Yaoundé and more come out to share their love for spoken word. One way IYA stands out is by actually training the poets a few days prior to the event to ascertain that their performances are of good quality and they show progress from practice. As a result of this, you might meet the same faces, but you’d likely be surprised by the stark difference in content and delivery. Attendance is usually ticketed using Eventbrite and the room is packed! Sometimes the evening’s have a theme and at other times it’s up to your whim. Either way, it is easy to see that IYA started something which rekindled the beauty of storytelling in poetry from among youth in the area. Mito Mito Mito Mito, a weekly Open Mic event equally originated in Buea likewise offers new encouragement to word lovers in Cameroon and offers to make poetry cool again. The events held regularly as of 7 pm on Mondays and mixed spoken word with Comedy, Karaoke, and Live Music. From Buea, Mito Mito has spread to Douala and the team behind it offering poetry performances on demand. For those of us who grew up at a time when poetry reciting in Cameroon consisted of rote memorization of some very tired lines teachers helped one with, this new wave of spoken word and the new generation vulnerable and bold enough to share art, what they read and write is utterly refreshing. And of course, stereotype defying. Black Swagger Poetry Events Let’s not focus solely on Buea though. Spoken word events like the BLACK SWAGGER POETRY SLAMs (BSPS) are hosted in Bamenda as well. Black Swagger poetry slams offer space for creatives based in the capital of the Northwest region and alternative evening entertainment encouraging wordsmiths and lovers of words alike to come out and share. The team ‘posits that Blackness is not an occasion for crying but a strong clarion call to stand up, stand out and be proud of who we are’ they try to discover unsung talents and help young people work on themselves by finding their own gift of words. Words that define them and define their stance on issues of change. Given the regularity of the events, one can confidently assert that there are enough word lovers; writers, thinkers, and listeners in Bamenda as well. A big shout out to the team behind the scenes making these events still possible despite the increasing militarization of the area. With events like this, they’re ensuring young people have a different outlet to vent. Better Breed Cameroon’s Reading Caravan More recently, I was privileged to be part of a team running an inaugural reading caravan project that aimed at inspiring reading culture in young Cameroonians- particular primary school pupils. The reading caravan began on the 23rd of February 2018 and closed on the 23rd of April 2018. This initiative lasted three-months and had over 20 volunteers read in eleven schools across towns in five regions of the country; Centre, Far North, Littoral, North-West and South-West regions. Over a hundred books were given out and the kids loved it! Eager to not only be read to but to read for themselves. Olivia Mukam Wandji volunteer reading at Tassah College, Yaounde I was particularly amazed at the support the caravan project received and is still receiving. The number of people who wrote offering to take time out to offer to read at
April 2018’s Missing Post I: Christian Journey Supplements
When I think of April, I think of World Book and Copyright Day on the 23rd… and birthdays of a few unforgettable friends. Both of these aspects of April; the international day commemorating one of my favorite resources- books- and the support offered by the friends which render them unforgettable inspired the blog for this month. I decided to make a list of top five resources- aside from the Bible, of course, lol- which have contributed to my growth as a Christian. Consider this a list of my most used Christian Journey Supplements. I hope someone gains something from my list, and I look forward to reading what additional material my readers use in the comment section! Here we go: #5- My Phone Apps! Okay, let’s get the most used resources out of the way first eh? Anyone who knows me personally knows my phone is rarely far from my reach. But while I can agree to be a bit addicted (yes, I said just a bit), I can’t completely curse this problem because my phone has apps which help as much as they distract. The first Christian app I download with any new device is the Bible App- Youversion which goes beyond being a bible because it offers a vast variety of rich devotionals. I particularly love how they literally award you with badges and ‘points’ for how regularly you check in and how often you complete a reading plan/devotional. Also a big plus, being able to share with friends and go through a bible study/meditation with a loved one far away. My phone app list equally includes well-known devotional apps like the Our Daily Bread, Daily Hope and so on. Recently, I discovered yet another gem of an app, the Prayer App, which helps one list down all the things and people for which they want to pray for. Not only does this app assist in guiding your prayers and ensuring you don’t forget something you planned to meditate on, but you can also set reminders and have an alarm notify you of your quiet time. You may think “I don’t need an app to remind me to pray” and you’re right, you likely don’t. But how often do you pledge to pray for something/someone and forget because it doesn’t concern you directly, or how often do you tell someone “I’ll help you pray” and then their problem slips from your mind because well, you were just “being nice”? Well, this app is there to remind you, help you keep those pledges and ensure your prayers are intentional and well directed. You conveniently classify your prayer topics- Family members, friends, Personal flaws and issues you need to work on, your country, etc. I can honestly say this app has helped me keep the commission to pray for others more faithfully. And ooh! When a prayer is answered, you get to archive and see how far you’ve come in your archives! Finally, Pinterest may not be considered a Christian App, but since an older friend of mine dragged me down that rabbit hole, I’ve found loads of inspirational messages and prayer memes to pin and encourage me on down days. Just create a board and try not to get addicted LOL! #4- Christian Blogs and Study Bible Aids Though I have only recently become acquainted with Christian blogs like Desiring God, I have, however, grown to appreciate a lot of their content. The friend who introduced me to this blog likewise listed online study bible aids as a supplement for her journey and I must agree! These days we can never be too safe with cross-checking the interpretations of the gospel we are being given. Check out a top list of Bible study software here. #3 Gratitude Journal I started keeping a gratitude journal after a severe bout of depression in 2013. As a supplement to Christian practice, journaling, in general, is very encouraged. Be it journaling your experiences and lessons learned in a diary or keeping a prayer book, or as in my case- a gratitude journal. Either way, keeping track of what there is to be grateful has helped me keep some reason on the worst of days and helped grow faith as it provides evidence of things already done when it feels like I’m asking for the impossible with my prayers. #2 Youtube Sermons The year I traveled out of the country for my master’s studies marked the first time in my adult Christian journey that I would be away from home and away from the church family I belong(ed) to. After visiting two churches I did vibe with I decided to find an alternative. Coincidentally a friend of mine shared THIS sermon by Priscilla Shirer with me on Facebook and I loved it. Thus began my using YouTube as a church supplement. I literally planned my “church service” and invited friends who were in other countries to stream with me so we would watch and discuss the sermon together. We had praise break too 🙂 A gospel playlist of our favorite gospel songs open in another tab. While being away from home may have begun this practice, it has stayed with me. When for some reason I have to miss church, I assuage my guilt with organizing my own online service. Truth is, given my hearing impairment I, unfortunately, find myself in church most Sundays for simply the fellowship as I don’t always hear the word, so Youtube sermons have become a staple, especially when you find the right channel, the right preacher that really challenges you to study the word. Personally, my go-to sermons are those by Rick Warren’s Saddleback Church and Priscilla Shirer. Friends of mine have enjoyed sermons by Tony Evans (Priscilla Shirer’s father), Tim Keller, and John Piper who’s the brain behind Desiring God. However aside from just sermons, some channels on Youtube offer shows with like The Conversation or Christian spoken word poetry in general on P4CM which both entertains and inspires
On Finding A New Church
Hey there! Welcome back to my faith-journey tracking page. This month’s blog post was inspired by the recent self-evaluation I had as I sought a new church away from home. Recently, I moved to a new country for my studies and one of the first things I had to do was find out where I’d worship. As I considered one church versus the other, I found that this was a learning experience as to my needs as a Christian and my perceptions of what worship services should be for me. As I did an assessment of the options presented to me, I found that I looked for some four main features in a church. 1. I can’t even pretend and claim I went far and wide to look for the most “spiritual place”. I’m practical. So, of course, I first considered churches depending on who recommended it and how. Especially if it’s a church I’ve never heard of before. In that instance, the best advert a church can have is its members. Now I’m not saying you should judge the whole congregation by one or two members. But, it remains that when it comes to a church you know nothing about, what determines if you cross the threshold into that place of worship or not is the member who invites you and what impression they give you of their church. Once you get in you can make a decision for yourself, but you wouldn’t even enter without them doing something right. Even if that something is just piquing your curiosity. Other pragmatic factors include “how far is it?” Would I be able to attend regularly? How large? Will I get lost in the crowd or can I actually fellowship? How is the service program set up? Is it comprehensive for me? That is will the program have me feeling like we covered all bases in terms of fellowship or is the program sketchy, something I could have done at home on my own? 2- Next, I looked for if the Church had some guidelines, a charter, a welcome pack that explains to visitors how it was established? Who it is accountable to? On what foundations are the ministry is founded etc. If they don’t have this, I would research the establishment and pastor myself. Afterall, if you do background checks on someone babysitting your kid, why not research the person you are about to give yourself over to for spiritual guidance? 3- Perhaps most importantly, I looked at the messages the church chooses to focus on. If the sermons are usually inclined to the benefits fo belonging to God as opposed to the requirements of those who seek to be called his own and how we can grow more like his son then I become wary. I also look at how the message is passed? Do I learn new scripture, do I come away feeling like my knowledge of the Word grew? Or do you feel like I could have stayed at home and read a self-help book? 4- I likewise looked at how does the church is structured. You’d be surprised what the seating layout at a church would reveal. Look around and take note, do people from all walks of life mix? Aside from the possible areas reserved for the choir, are there seemingly no-go areas? Is there some sort of position of prestige for those supposed more spiritual, better off economically? Speaking of which, do you note where the children are? Are they given a chance to mix, a part of the service? How does the church share the word to the children? And if (like me) you’re in a society with some social divide; class, linguistic, racial etc. does the church address social justice issues? If the church doesn’t then that would be problematic for me. After all, we aren’t existing in a vacuum 5- Finally, as I assessed churches I forced myself to remember that the church is a hospital for the spiritually sick and I shouldn’t expect it to be perfect. No one here is perfect, and as an institution made up of flawed people, the establishment will have its flaws. It should matter more that these flaws are recognized and hopefully openly addressed to be worked on as one body in Christ. So what do you look for in a church? What attracts you to a new fellowship or turns you away? What are you deal breakers? (Consistent prosperity preaching and blatant sexism are my dealbreakers by the way) Drop a comment below and let me know what you think!